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Avoid 5 Big Mistakes Good Parents Make
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Your Parenting Style is Key to Raising Responsible Children
The "Do as I Say, Not as I Do" Parenting Style Doesn't Work Anymore

Have you ever done research on different parenting styles in order to choose the best one for you and your family? Or, do you approach parenting from your experience of how you were raised as a child. Perhaps you have said to yourself, "I will not raise my children the way my parents raised me" or "My parents spanked me and I turned out okay, so spanking will work on my children". Both responses are 'knee jerk' reactions on how to parent, not a choice founded on sound child rearing principles.

You may not even question your parenting style until you start having problems with your children. It may seem like suddenly your current parenting style isn't work anymore and you don't know why. Good parenting does not necessarily come naturally. And, being a good parent is not easy but there are skills you can learn to meet the challenge of good parenting. It takes finding a sound, practical parenting style and then taking the time for training and practice.

Parent education is not required but is becoming more and more necessary and available as society has begun to value the job of parenting. Learning good parenting skills that are respectful and result oriented, is a challenge that can be met.

What Should You Expect from a Positive, Respectful Parenting Style?
• To eliminate the need for spanking, time-outs and grounding
• Move from reward and punishment discipline to influence and guide good behavior
• Learn effective techniques that make "Temper Tantrums" a thing of the past
• A parenting style that is easy to implement and produces effective results
• A parenting style that can be effective through all the stages of childhood
• To guide children to be cooperative, responsible and happy
• The ability to create a positive and loving relationship with your children
• To be able to raise children who will be responsible adults able to cope in the world

There are various parenting styles but they all fall into three basic categories. Most parents will have one primary parenting style but you may see aspects of your particular parenting style in all of the them.

Giving Orders
This is an authoritarian parenting style. Authoritarian parents don't feel they need to explain their rules or the reasons why they expect their children to do certain things. The main focus of these parents is on what their children do wrong and the punishment for misbehavior is often harsh. Should a child question a rule, they will often hear from their parents, "Because I said so". Parents that use this style feel they must be in control all the time. They parent by a set of rules that must be followed. Children have little or no freedom. Discipline is usually a form of reward and punishment. Children learn early to please their parents to gain a reward. They may behave because they fear their parents. Children either go along and have a hard time learning to think for themselves or they may rebel in reaction to the controlling methods of their parents.

Giving In
This is a permissive parenting style. Parents who adopt this style may have concerns that their children will not like them if they set limits or they see themselves as their children's friend and not their parent who is there to guide and set limits. These parents allow freedom with little or no responsibility. As their children get older these parents may feel they have no power to make changes in their children's misbehavior. Children without limits have no sense of responsibility, have trouble with relationships and the rights of others and can find the world a difficult place. It is unfair to raise a child without limits or to keep changing the limits that are set. Children do not need or want freedom without limitations.

Giving Choices
This is a democratic parenting style. The days of "Do what I say without question" are over. This means having the attitude that both parents and children are equals. Not in the sense of life experience or intelligence but in value. From an early age parents have clear expectations for their children and enforce reasonable limits. Children are given limited choices to help them learn and experience the consequences of their choices and that their decisions count. Giving choices balances freedom with responsibilities.When children have some control and ownership in their lives they are more cooperative and have better self-esteem. Parents focus on encouragement and acknowledgment of good behavior. Parents focus on discipline that teaches not a one that intimidates with punishment or promotes good behavior with inappropriate rewards.

Where do you begin to learn a respectful and effective parenting style?
How do you know of that a democratic parenting styles will work in your family?
Which parental advice expert is the right one?
It is possible to replace your anxiety about doing it right with a confident parenting style?

Consider Taking an Online Parenting Class
• Our online parenting classes are facilitated by parenting experts so you don't have to struggle through books on parenting skills, parenting advice, parent training and positive parenting.
• Start learning and implementing effective parenting skills right away in our online parenting classes
• Parenting classes are based on the work of psychologist Alfred Adler. There are many parenting books that translate his approach into easy to understand language. We use the Positive Discipline series books for the online parenting classes.
• Our facilitators are experts in this parenting style with years of experience
• Personal coaching available 24/7 during the 8 week classes.

How Online Parenting Classes Work

*Your Certificate of Completion Guarantee
Our online parenting classes have been accepted by courts nationwide. Parents, grandparents and teachers take our online classes for personal reasons and some to fulfill a legal requirement. If you need a Certificate of Completion, we encourage you read the information for court ordered parenting classes we provide for you and submit it to your social worker, lawyer or family court for pre-approval. We are so confident in the content and quality of our online classes, your Certificate of Completion is guaranteed to be accepted by the courts or your money back. Please read our parenting class guarantee for details.


Does your agency need a parenting class that provides ongoing support, the ability to track the progress of participants, is based on natural and logical consequences not corporal punishment and is an excellent model for families with a history of domestic violence? If so contact us to see how we can customize classes for you.
   
 
Articles and content contained in LifeMatters are educational in nature and not intended for and should not be interpreted as medical advice or psychotherapy.